Longing for trains…
As my world slows at the end of the week I often find myself sitting quietly on a Saturday morning. In these moments I am consumed by a longing for something, something I interpret as trains…
Trains large or small, real or model. To see them, visit them, buy models of them. Of course BR blue or sector liveries are preferable, if steam it has to be GWR or narrow gauge - ok so not just any trains, trains that fit within my current preferences… but a longing for something to fill the void, to recharge me. Trains.
It’s quiet enough to think in these moments. Early enough to just be still for fear of disturbing the sleeping family, although the dog is already company. Thinking.
Perhaps this isn’t actually about trains. Perhaps it is about me?
Trains and railways are such a large part of my life, they’re a vehicle (if you’ll excuse the pun) in many ways for my personality - of course I’m going to ‘long’ for them in low mood…
Sitting and accepting how I feel in these moments rather than burying myself in being busy is proving to be difficult but powerful. Self reflection, pausing just enough to take a look at myself, to sit and be with that feeling - rather than getting out a book, watching a video, visiting a railway, doing some modelling… this is important too… interrogating that feeling of longing is helping me accept who I am… to be ok.
Trains. I love trains.
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"Perhaps it is about me?"
ReplyDeleteNaturally. Be sure it is about you.
One of the inscriptions above the entrance to the cave, where the priestess Pythia held her office in the ancient Greek Oracle of Delphi, exhorted newcomers: γνῶθι σεαυτόν, i. e. gnothi seauton, meaning "know thyself". Observing from where I am, it looks like you've made a long way on this path of self-discovery. Thus you can be considered a successful and happy human which in today's chaotic times few people succeed in.
And no, it's definitely not a matter of wealth and power. The richest and most powerful people are usually the most unhappy ones.
Thank you Hank, I appreciate this wonderful comment and reflection. A long way on this path indeed, and sometimes it’s stopping to realise that which can help with the road ahead.
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